...and I Approve This Message

Having just told a cute female bartender that he wanted to come back in his second life as a bottle opener, so he can slide around in her back pocket, this narrator leaves her bar and smashes his car into a tree. He does indeed wake up as a bottle opener and finds himself hanging on a string tied to a hook in the ceiling of a Lawton, Oklahoma bar. The opener, realizing that he is now "a dead man", loses any fear of speaking what is on his mind. Since no one can hear him anyway, he immediately begins ranting about the starving children in America, politics, lawyers, lobbyists, the media, cell phones and many other pet peeves he's harbored through out his life. Oddly, he can see and hear and constantly hears organ music and some type of ticker tape machine, or maybe a typewriter in the back ground. The bottle opener is moved to various bars around America and the world. Before long he realizes that he is following the path of his real life and begins to worry. As he (it) moves from bar to bar he continues to let loose with the many things that he hated when alive. Foreign aid is strongly questioned and the cost of the war in Iraq almost has the bottle opener tongue tied. As time goes on, he is sad that he did not get to do more with his life. He soon realizes that the young people in America should start earlier in their lives to learn about politics and other issues that will affect their future while they can still make a difference. Please don't start reading at the end of the book.... live a little of a bottle opener's life first